it's been a pretty long time since i haven't write a real post. i mean.. the truly from my heart one. i never get transparent anyway. though it's my blog, i still treat it like a notice board that anyone can read. so i'm being extra cautious. no chance of being true self? naah..
i can conclude this week as my worst week. not of my lifetime but i'm praying that it will stay the worst for this year.
i know i want to keep this as a memory so i write it down. hopefully it will be washed out of my heart. and my head.
what happened this week?
- i got a horror news regarding my health status. it's not that bad and still waiting for conformation. but the fact that i'm facing this without my family, it is called heart broken.
- i'm super duper missing my family. who is sometimes got another commitment to be fulfilled. and it kept me waiting and waiting. and it is, heart broken-ing.
- i got lone phobic (if it ever exist) that is, i can't be left alone in the room. it can cause depression you know. and i was left by my roommate who went for induction and stuff for nearly a week. and it made my heart broken.
- i got no mood to study (blame myself for that) and also to go to meeting. i'll doodle for the first page that i read and i went meeting with the face that i want to kill every members and get the president post. haha. but still, it get my heart broken.
- i got amnesia and suddenly confused about my timetable (which now is already past mid-sem) and to be extra lucky, i got quiz on that day. so, hooray najibah. you forgot your own class. i think i got neuron shot (if it ever exist). heart broken again.
- i got extra sensitive and eventually hurt my friends around me. which i never intended to. i felt like a jerk and i was really sorry. that is a real heart broken.
so now i'm home. fixing those broken pieces. gluing it back. tightly. so it will be less fragile and vulnerable. i hope i fix it well. so that it will withstand another worst week which i pray won't come back, please.
still, i got the most precious moral lesson from this week,
when u are in need the most. u will realise that u only have Him.
-najibahmahirah-
