It's Holiday!

Baru 7 hari cuti dah freak out tak tentu pasal sebab culture shock. Yelah, dari exam yang cramp macam tak boleh nak fikir benda lain kepada hari-hari yang tak tahu nak fikir apa? Huhu.

Alhamdulillah.. Allah tunjuk jalan untuk isi masa lapang ini dengan benda yang berfaedah. Bukannya takde plan sebelum cuti. Tapi tiba-tiba semua tergendala. Takde rezeki mungkin. Hehe. InsyaAllah ini adalah kerja cuti terancam saya :)

1)  Jadi Teacher English kat Maahad sebelah rumah ni.

Mula-mula nak kerja lain.. Dah suruh mak tanyakan sebelum cuti hari tu. Tapi tiba-tiba mak tanya nak mengajar tak kat Maahad sebelah ni? Bahasa Inggeris ke.. Apa lagi. Feberet tu.. Huhu. InsyaAllah start minggu depan. Berdebar jugak anak murid semua hero-hero. Nakal sangat aku lastik jugak! :p

2)  Nak makeover Bilik.

Memang terabai la kan bilik selama ni. Lama-lama kang boleh jadi The Haunted Room. Huhuhu. InsyaAllah sedang kutip semangat nak makeover ala-ala Eric Surprise! Inspirasi tema Country Style Room Deco. Semoga jadi macam kat bawah ni:

Ameeeeeeeeen panjang-panjang :D

3) Nak habiskan baca bukuuuuuuu!

Memang tak akan habis rasanya. Tapi at least biarlah boleh khatam beberapa buah buku yang penting.  Memang bertimbun sangatlah bawak balik hari tu. Bukan senang nak start hadam buku. Kena mentally prepared. Dah cuti ni memang nak naskhah yang ringan-ringan je. Adoi -,-“

Yang ni semua sebenarnya sampingan sahaja. Saya memang dah ada kerja tetap sejak menjejakkan kaki ke rumah ni ha. Macam kat bawah nilah lebih kurang. Hehe. 

Semoga cuti bermanfaat semuanya! Wassalam :)

She's engaged :)

A sweet day for a sweet girl.

dan biasalah nak interframe :p

Terima Kasih Ya Allah!

Di ulangtahun ini, tiada apalah yang seharusnya aku lakukan selain memanjatkan setinggi rasa kesyukuran ke hadrat Ilahi Rabbi atas segala kurniaan yang tak terhingga sementelah aku masih bernafas ini.

Ya Allah,

Terima kasih atas kurniaan keluarga yang menyayangi,

Terima kasih atas kurniaan sahabat yang memahami,

Terima kasih atas segala kemudahan yang Kau beri,

Terima kasih atas pengajaran yang diteladani,

TERIMA KASIH ATAS HIDUP INI.

Terima kasih Ya Allah! 

“Am I a professional muslim?” by Prof Dr Muhaya.

An inspirational speaker does not need a script. She just spoke through her heart and with the guidance of Allah. And well, she did touch every single heart of the audience. SubhanAllah.

“Am I a professional muslim?” by Prof Dr Muhaya.

Ciri mukmin professional

•            Bertaqwa kepada Allah
•         Berakhlak dengan manusia
•         Kerja sebaik mungkin (itqan)

4 jenis manusia

•  Make things happen
•  Wait for things to happen
• Wonder what happens
•  Don’t know what happens

Be the first person. The rest are losers.

“None of us has the right to think that we are better than anyone else”

The most Superior is Allah SWT.

“The more we show, actually the less we have”

Stop showing off, we have nothing.

“The more you put on, the less pretty you are”

Less is always more J

“Only problematic people have problems”

We create our own problem. We have the choice to make it smaller or to outgrow the problem. Most of us outgrow them. Choose wiser now.

4 Levels of Knowledge

•  Unconscious incompetence
•  Conscious incompetence
• Conscious competence
• Unconscious competence

Professionals are those who are unconsciously competent. Meaning they do not know they are good at something but just do the things effortlessly.

Subconscious Mind

The power of mind in controlling our life. What we are is actually what we think we are. This may sound cliché but trust me it’s true.

“Our inner world controls our outer world. Thoughts influence by emotion will lead to action and result. Positive thoughts will then produce positive results”.

“Kareer adalah untuk memenuhi tujuan hidup iaitu redha Allah bukan untuk memenuhi keperluan hidup iaitu kebendaan”

“The most insane person is the one doing the same thing, expecting different result –Albert Einstein”

“Macam mana kita buat baik pada orang, macam itulah Allah akan buat baik pada kita”.

“Once you have Allah, you don’t need anybody else”.

Last but not least, you have to see it to believe it. She's great ;)

Wallahu'alam.

A letter for you

Dear beloved Abe Kir,

I’m writing this letter to you in these few moments that you’re still single. I’m afraid it will sound different when you are already called a husband J

I ran into my old writings last night and saw the story I wrote about us. And I’m actually embarrassed that I was so loud with my words. But I think because you are so far, I need to shout out for you to hear.

I know I’m supposed to be happy; it’s your big day. But the fact that we’re not there made my mood sway. These few days, I’m preoccupying myself to avoid the thought that you’re getting married. And you are in a few bits.

Dear beloved Abe Kir,

I just want to say THANK YOU.

Thank you for the times you’re there for me,

Thank you for the wise words you gave me,

Thank you for just kept silence when I cried,

And just hear my tears and let it dry.

Thank you for leading my way,

When sometimes I went astray,

Thank you for making me smile,

Though the jokes are hard to buy J

Thank you for taking me seriously,

And thank you because you really care.

I won’t ask for another one, because you have been the best. I just hope that I’m not losing you and my phone will still ring with ‘private number’ on the view J

Now that you found your other half, I’m absolutely thrilled. You found yourself a solehah wife, and I’m praying that you’ll be forever happy.  

Barakallahulakuma Wabaraka ‘Alaikuma Wajama’a Bainakuma Fi Khair <3

lepas ni orang lain pulak kat sebelah tu :P

Hey young fella

I watched you from the corner of my eyes. It’s not like I don’t care. We were friends before, don’t you dare to forget. Once you are in confusion, I try to lead you on and showed you the way. And you attentively following like you really care.

Never did I know you’re just like chameleon. You’re yellow when with me, next time you’re green. I thought you did see what I was showing you. Never did I know, you’re blinded by the truth. Hold on, fella. I’ll try to save you. But the next thing I know, you’re nearly drowned without a clue.

Not did you don’t have the slightest idea. It’s just you’re too preoccupied to see. Hold on fella, wait for me. Listen for a bit, I’ll make you wait. You’re currently committing suicide. If you’re not going to die, it will sure leave a scar.

But you’re still busy. With the new life you’re having. Fun, joyful as it never been, when you still listen to me. I know my type of life will not be as much fun, but I’ll guarantee it will make you in peace and calm. So hold on fella, listen to me. I got something to tell you, please hear me.

That joy you’re having now is surely temporary. It will not be as much fun when the day you see Him. He will ask everything that you’re doing and I’m afraid you’ll call me to explain.

Yes, I did tell you the truth. But you might say it’s not enough for you. So hold on fella, listen to me. Just one more time, I beg you please think. It’s not that I’m not willing to answer for you. But I’m afraid I can’t answer mine so please help me too.

I care for you, because we were friends. I’ll help you out when you need a hand. But sometimes these hands are not that strong, to hold you for way too long. That’s why I’m asking you know,

Please come back where you belong :”) 

My journey started from his journey

Love you boy.

I do not intend to discriminate any of my kids (nieces and nephews) but I do have one very special kid that truly influences my life journey.  My journey of stepping into the “ear world” has started because he already started his. His name is Muhammad Ateef Zhofran, my fourth nephew.  I never shared his story before because I thought it was something confidential. But I want everyone related to know how he already affected my life without his consent, I believe.

Last time I was determined that I was going to be somewhat a medical doctor. I never thought of the difficult journey, but rather it was a lifelong ambition. So I thought it was mandatory from the beginning. Never did I know that Allah predetermined that I was meant in another specialization of the health field which is called Audiology. Never heard about it and never knew it will someday be something very major in my life. But I was so determined to choose it from all the options of the allied health sciences and at that time I don’t know why.

What I do know is my urge is very much induced by the condition of my nephew. Ateef was diagnosed to have profound and severe hearing impairment when he was about one and a half year old. At that time I do not realize how severe his condition was. What I do know is maybe Allah has set my path with him as the precursor. So, I keep my stand tight and decided to go with it. And I did.

Now, I’m on my way of finishing my first year of Bachelor of Audiology. And what I can say is the more I learn in this course, the more I get to know his side of the world. And I do quickly become emotional when I knew the real condition of his impairment. How silent his world was, how difficult for him to learn and how it’s hard for him to make people understand. The real condition of his ear, the possibility of accumulation of amniotic fluid, the part of middle ear involved and the afterward effects.

I know I have to be stronger than today so that I will discover his world without flowing tears. But sometimes I just can’t help myself and I know that is because I love him so much and I want him to be fine. And thanks to him also he opened the door for me to understand other types of disorders for other children about his age. And MasyaAllah there are numerous types of disorders suffered by millions of children around the whole world. And there are only related to communication!

He taught me many things without his consent. He taught me to be emphatic to children with disorders, to be patient and understanding and to be helpful. How I wish I can be of a help to them. Because they never wished for the condition, they are gifted with it. But how important for us to try to understand and help with their learning progress.  They will ease our path to Jannah afterwards insyaAllah.

Ateef had undergone cochlear implant last year and regained his hearing Alhamdulillah. But we do know that it is only the beginning of his new journey of learning and coping with everything. Soon, by years I will discover more about his current world and what may be helpful to it. I want to be strong and resilient so that I will withstand the coming episodes of his real world. I want him to know that Acu is struggling to learn everything for him and his friends in the future insyaAllah. I want to be the best audiologist, speech therapist, psychologist and linguist for him so that he will need nobody else.

O Allah, please ease my path of seeking knowledge and

O Allah, please put him under your full protection and please ease his path of knowing the world.

You Indeed Know Best  :”)

Saya tak minta

Terkadang manusia akan hanya fikirkan diri sendiri. Apa yang baik untuknya, itulah yang terbaik untuk semua orang. Walhal terkadang ada yang boleh tersakiti oleh apa yang diperbuatkan.

Saya serik. Pernah difitnah dan dijaja cerita merata-rata. Hanya disebabkan ego seorang manusia. Ya, saya banyak mencabar ego orang. Kerana saya seorang yang tidak akan tunduk kepada apa yang tidak betul. Saya punya prinsip dan saya pohon agar prinsip saya tidak akan berubah sampai ke mati.

Tetapi sesetengah orang tak dapat terima. Konservatif katanya. Yang kau katakan konservatif itu agamamu! Agama yang kekal relevan sehingga hari manusia hancur dimamah bumi. Jangan cuba mempermudahkan apa yang sudah tersurat sebagai hukum. Itu syariat namanya.

Saya tidak ingin membenci orang. Kerana saya juga manusia biasa yang membuat kesilapan. Tetapi saya sedikit pun tidak kisah andai dikatakan lancang jika yang saya pertahankan itu benar. Kerana kebenaran itu tetap benar dalam apa jua situasi dan sifatnya utuh. Saya cuma menegaskan sahaja.

Saya tak minta. Menjadi bahan cerita jajaan orang. Jika boleh disarungkan jubah halimunan, saya sanggup. Demi maruah dan agama saya.

Saya juga berharap teman seangkatan saya semuanya kuat menolak apa yang fana. Apa yang salah tetap salah tanpa kompromi. Jika kita membuka ruang, kita juga yang akan terjerumus akhirnya. Jangan takut untuk berkata tidak.

Saya doakan kekuatan untuk semua kaum Hawa yang berusaha menjaga diri dan hati. InsyaAllah Allah bersama kita, maka siapa lagi yang kita mahukan?

Those times, Baba.

I’ve been restraining myself to write about you. Because it won’t happen without tearing my eyes. But I let my fingers dance this time. Just because.

Those times, Baba that I will miss the most.

Those times when you still have your goats. And you asked me to come with you. You worked so hard to feed them while I struggled to keep them off my feet. You cut the grass with your bare hands when suddenly the rain pours down heavily. I shaded you with the umbrella while you continue to work. They will get hungry in the evening, you said. And when the rain last too long, we decided to hide under the barn. And yes, it didn’t smell so nice, but I was with you. Giggling and chatting, about your goats. Watching the rain patting down, while you smile as it will grow your grass. And I smile, watching you smile.

Those times when we went to your farm. I drive the car by your side. And at that time, you will keep up the stories about me. We fell silence for a while, but those silence were never awkward. You will laugh at the way I’m afraid of pacat and will try to get them off. You sighed watching the streams no longer crystal clear. And we went to eat ikan sungai in nearby restaurant. You smiled at the way I hungrily eat because it’s too good and you’ll ask me to eat more. And we both agreed that ikan sebarau is the best.

Those times when went to far away masjid. You are in charge to be the imaam of solat tarawikh. And because it’s too far, Mama asked me to keep you a company. We chatted all the way there and you will suddenly mengaji like beautifully and I will listen and admiring. Baba, it’s so nice to pray in between a full crowd, knowing that you are the imaam. And sometimes your voice is low, and I know you’re being emotional. Baba, it’s so nice to hold my hand together hearing your du’a while in there, you inserted the du’a for your family and children, knowing that it include me.

Those times when you try to converse with me in Arabic. And it will last until the third question because I won’t know how to answer more and just simply said ‘Laa adri’ which means ‘I don’t know’ and you’ll laugh and patted my back. I was so envious to hear you converse with Akir and not understanding a word you guys were talking. And I know how you’re happy and how you missed to converse in Arabic and I’m sorry I can’t keep up.

Those times when I tried to read your kitaab. But I was stuttering because it’s in Arabic. But you will patiently provide me meaning of every word with the hope that I will understand. And I do, Baba. Thank you. Some day, some times I will make use of the kitaabs as you always wanted.

Those times when I was reading the Quran inside my room. And you will suddenly correct my reading. It was so nice feeling that you’re actually attentively hearing my reading and correcting my mistakes. And I was so envious actually that you can cry while reading the Quran and sometimes you can sigh. I can just imagine how true it feels to be able to understand the verses by word.

Those are the times, Baba that I will treasure the most. I know you got so much hope in your children. Sometimes it may come true and sometimes it may not. But I want you to know that we are trying our best to make you happy and smile to your heart’s content.

And Baba, I personally ask you this, that some day if someone reaches for my hand, please make sure that he is able to hold mine like you have been holding all this while.

And Baba, I am and forever always your girl. Uhibukka giddan.

I've fallen in love

Nope. Kidding. I've just fallen in love with this guy's voice. I never liked cover songs before, but this one he did great! And the good thing is he turn every ugly loud noises into something we called MUSIC. Therefore, I can catch those lyrics meant to be understood, rather than just annoying pain in the ear.

Miserable guy so much in love :) Btw, the lyrics ain't so nice but his voice is.

Some things best left unsaid.

You had a fight with your husband. You’re mad till you’re insane. You had nowhere to go. You got a huge lump in your throat, waiting for the time to spill it out. But you know you’ll be fine as soon as he went after you. So, some things best left unsaid.

You got a huge crush on this girl. You go crazy over her like everyday seems imperfect without seeing her shadow. You can’t hold yourself. But you know you can’t marry now. So, some things best left unsaid.

You are mad with your friend. She irritated you a whole lot of time. You decided to be patient but sometimes it went overboard. You know she will be hurt if you say a word. So, some things best left unsaid.

You are sick till you can’t wake up. Your breath felt hard, your body felt limp. You wish you were home. You know your mom loves you to death. But you also know she will be worried sick. So, some things best left unsaid.

You know your brother is cool and your sister is super cute. But you also know they will be over the moon if you tell them the truth. So, these things also best left unsaid :D

But there’s Someone that will be always there for you. Everytime. And you can tell Him everything. Like EVERY SINGLE thing. And what’s best is He has the power over all.

You’ll make up with your honey star, because of His will.

You’ll marry the one you always like, because of His will.

You’ll happily accept your friend, because of His will.

You’ll be tough and strong when you’re sick, because of His will.

So seek Him, because He’s waiting for you :’)  Ar Rahman Ar Rahim.

And your Lord says: Call on Me, I will answer your (prayer). But Those who are too arrogant to serve Me will surely find themselves in hell, in humiliation." [Al-Quran, Surah Mu'min, verse 60]